Colorful Couple Encountered At The Razor's Edge
SUPERVALU is always looking for new business, and since one of the grocery stores in Ripley is scheduled to begin using the services of SUPERVALU Lewis Grocer Co., Indianola, MS, I’ve had reason to visit the store as a SUPERVALU representative for the past two weeks. Last week, I concluded my business shortly after noon, so I decided to forgo lunch and drop by Malcolm’s barbershop to see if he was working that day. Entering his business, I didn’t see anyone inside and called out, "Is anybody here?" Malcolm, who was seated at a computer behind a privacy wall, responded, "Yeah!" He turned in his chair and recognized me instantly. "How are you doing?" I asked. "Losing money on every stock," he poor-mouthed. At the time Malcolm retired he was heavily invested in low-value stocks, and had he cashed them all in, he would still be retired. But, like a poker player, Malcolm found it difficult to "know when to hold them, know when to fold them, and know when to run." Needless to say, he began to lose money in the market and ended up reopening his barbershop. We talked briefly about our health troubles and experiences. He told me he was about to begin a series of treatments in Oxford, MS, to relieve the pain in his "good knee." "I need a knee replacement like I had in ’95," he stated, "But, I can’t afford to miss three months of work." "Bring Dorothy in to work for you like you did the last time," I suggested. "She’s not doing any good, either," Malcolm stated. "She’s steadily losing weight and keeps having pain in her arm and shoulder and her upper back." "You better get that woman to a heart doctor," I shared. "Part of what you described sounds like some of my symptoms." We were in the middle of a discussion on the pros and cons of stubbornness when a "colorful" couple walked into the barbershop. He was tall and thin; she was short and dumpy. He seemed surprised to see Malcolm. "I didn’t know you were back in business. We just saw that you were open and walked in. Can I get a flat-top?" the man asked. The man’s hair was already closely shorn in a crew cut style, and with his receding hairline, I wondered if he’d have enough to stand up in a flat-top. I finished the sentence that had been interrupted by the couple’s entrance that had something to do with my heart attack. By this time, the man was seated in the barber chair. "I got three stents, myself," he bragged, before asking about my medications. His wife, who was seated beside me, seemed interested as well, and asked me several questions about my heart attack. The couple and I talked about health concerns for several minutes as Malcolm busied himself cutting the man’s hair. At some point I explained why the doctor recommended I take each of the medications. "I don’t mean to dispute you, sir," the man commented, "But, my doctor told me Plavix was supposed to clean out my arteries and flush out the fat." Just as politely, I replied, "You know, mine may have told me the same thing, but all I remember about Plavix is that it’s a blood thinner, which is supposed to reduce the stress on my heart to pump blood." He appeared satisfied with my explanation. Malcolm was almost done with the flat-top; all that remained was a touch-up or two. I saw that Malcolm had some of his homemade fishing lures on the wall behind an empty stall. The sign indicated the price for the spinner baits was $2.00. I couldn’t resist purchasing a couple of lures, knowing the next time I fish with Gordon, Hess, and Sansing, they won’t have any quite like them. Noticing the woman’s long dark hair, Malcolm said, "You need to get up in this chair and let me cut your hair. As long as it is, you could donate it to a wig-maker to help cancer victims." "Whooee, I ain’t never gonna cut my hair," she replied. "But that'd be for a good cause, wouldn’t it?" "A teenage girl came in the other day and had me cut hers. It was really long. She was going to donate her hair to cancer victims and said she felt really good about what she was doing." "I bet a wig like that would cost $300.00," the woman stated. "That’s not a drop in the bucket," I knowingly responded. "Yeah, what did you pay for your first hairpiece?" Malcolm asked me, "About two thousand, wasn’t it?" "No, it wasn’t that high; it was more like twelve hundred, but they keep going up." Malcolm finished with the man in the chair. I noticed he had difficulty getting out of the chair and his movements appeared to be hindered by stiffness. As he reached with his right hand for his billfold, he asked Malcolm, "How much do I owe you?" "Ten dollars," Malcolm replied. I noticed he had a large bruise on his upper arm and so did Malcolm. "Man! What happened to you?" Malcolm asked. "The city police did that to me the other night. They give me this, too!" he said, pointing to the bruise under his right eye." The man provided no explanation as to what had transpired, but I presumed he might have been resisting arrest. Apparently, his wife was involved as well. "Yeah, they bruised me, too," she explained, pulling up a sleeve to show off what appeared to be small bruises left by fingertips pressed tightly on her upper arm. "One of ‘em sat on top of me, right on my ruptured disk in my back." I supposed they were prouder of their injuries than they were of what they had done to incur them, and I wasn’t about to ask what they might have done. Anyway, I didn’t suspect the woman’s missing front tooth had anything to do with the recent episode with the city police. However, as they exited the barbershop, I could not resist saying, "Y’all try to stay out of trouble." However, I doubt that will be the case. I imagine trouble has a way of finding them, whether they seek it or not.
Graduation Day School Of Education Sometime within the past six to eight weeks, Felicia asked, "Uncle Wayne, are you coming to my graduation?" Of course, my opinion of graduation runs along the line of marriage – everyone should have to go through it, but only once. Plus, I don’t think I’ve ever been to a graduation that I enjoyed. Anyway, graduations aren’t so much for the graduate as they are for the parents and relatives of the graduate. Sure, the graduate is awarded a diploma and some graduates receive special recognition for certain academic accomplishments, but for the most part, graduation is a time for parents to assess their own worth as enabler, provider, and sustainer of their son or daughter. High school graduations are emotional times for everyone involved, especially in schools where the graduating class is small enough for everybody to know one another. First Baptist Church, Pontotoc, has taken the emotional aspect of graduation to a new plateau. For several successive years, FBC has added something to the baccalaureate service, the most recent addition involving a video of each individual graduate thanking those who made his or her success possible. It’s not something I care to watch, but they wont’ let me have the remote control. For the parents of college graduates, it should also be a time of acceptance and release. By virtue of the degree conferred upon the graduate, parents are to accept their child’s readiness to enter the adult world of work, career, and family planning. Simply put, parents are to let go. College graduations tend to be lengthy and boring, but I told Felicia I planned to be at her graduation. She would, of course, have to remind me of such things as time and place. I later learned that things have changed since I graduated Ole Miss. When I was there all the graduates were herded into one location, which I believe was the gymnasium because it rained, and there weren’t enough seats for everyone and only immediate family was allowed inside. I also remember it was August and the gym was hot. Felicia informed me graduation would occur in "the grove," a few shady acres on campus that most folks identify with football season. "Unless it rains," Felicia added. And, it did rain. The folks who attended the morning ceremonies were drenched. I only knew about the diploma ceremony which was scheduled for 1:30 p.m. and wasn’t sure why Sarah had left with Felicia early Saturday morning. It was still raining in Pontotoc at noon and Barbara and I were on the verge of canceling our commitment to attend Felicia’s graduation when I checked the local weather radar and saw the rain had moved out of the Oxford area. Barbara and I were on campus at one o’clock but without a clue as to where the Indoor Practice Facility was located. We parked near the baseball stadium and asked a Campus Security officer how to get to the Indoor Practice Facility. As luck would have it, the officer had a speech stutter, which gave him considerable difficulty in making me understand his directions. But, I learned the place I needed to be was behind the football stadium, an impressive structure, which I could clearly see from where we had parked. I might have been better off to have followed his advice to drive to the coliseum area which would be closer to the facility than was the baseball stadium. Yet, with bumper to bumper traffic, Barbara and I chose to walk. Barbara explained that commencement exercises were occurring all over the campus. Different schools within the University were having commencement in different places such as the coliseum and the sport’s facility, the latter of which we were trying to locate. At the time it sounded a bit confusing, but I later considered I saved a lot of time by not having to sit through a few thousand graduates receiving diplomas. About the time we arrived at University Ave., we overheard a young woman say she was on her way to the School of Education graduation at the Indoor Practice Facility. Since she knew the way, Barbara and I followed her. For a fat girl, she was fleet of foot, and it was all we could do to match her pace. We arrived at the Indoor Practice Facility with a few minutes to spare and were able to find a couple of seats near the back of one section. I was impressed with the immense building more than I was with the artificial grass on which our folding chairs rested. The practice field was a full-sized football field with a running track circumscribing the playing field. The ceiling was high enough to permit indoor punting, and the whole place was air-conditioned. I saw a huge "weight room," but I don’t know what else was contained in the building, as I didn’t take time to tour it. Someone told me the facility was among the best in the country. Shortly after Barbara and I found seating, she checked for program materials only to discover all the materials had been taken. However, she found Sarah, Brett, and Kathy. There were two seats available directly in front of us, but we needed three additional seats. When a couple on the row in front of us vacated their seats, all our family was able to sit together. Plus, the folks to my right had extra program materials and were kind enough to share a set with us.
The speech by the class marshal was relatively brief as were the comments
of various professors. I was pleasantly surprised by the orderliness and
speed at which the ceremony was conducted. I was not surprised that rednecks
still attend commencement exercises and whoop and cheer whenever their family
member’s name is called to receive a diploma. Even though, it was clearly
announced for persons in the audience to hold their applause and/or cheers
until all the members of a particular group of graduates had received diplomas,
the rednecks present ignored the request. I don’t know that Black rednecks
outnumbered rednecks of other races, but they were certainly the loudest.
I’m pleased to say Felicia’s family members and supporters were
able to contain their enthusiasm until all of the candidates for a Bachelor
of Arts degree in Education received diplomas.
Felicia is a certified graduate of the University of Mississippi, but she apparently didn’t get enough schooling to do her. Instead of entering the ranks of the teaching profession this fall, Felicia plans to continue her part-time worker status at Chaney's Drugs. She will return to Ole Miss this summer in order to pursue a Masters Degree in Education, which means there's probably another graduation I’ll have to attend, sometime next year.
Bodock Beau Music Exam - Wrong Answers Misinformation is abundantly revealed by students in every environment. The following just happened to relate to music. Actual Answers From Students On Music Exams The principal singer of nineteenth century opera was called pre-Madonna. Gregorian chant has no music, just singers singing the same lines. Sherbet composed the Unfinished Symphony. All female parts were sung by castrati. We don't know exactly what they sounded like because there are no known descendants. Young scholars have expressed their rapture for: the Bronze Lullaby, the Taco Bell Cannon, Beethoven's Erotica, Tchaikovsky Cracknutter Suite, and Gershwin's Rap City in Blue. Music sung by two people at the same time is called a duel; if they sing without music it is called Acapulco. A virtuoso is a musician with real high morals. Contralto is a low sort of music that only ladies sing. Probably the most marvelous fugue was the one between the Hatfields and the McCoys. A harp is a nude piano. Refrain means don't do it. A refrain in music is the part you'd better not try to sing. I know what a sextet is but I'd rather not say. My favorite composer was Opus. Agnus Dei was a woman composer famous for her church music. Johann Sebastian Bach wrote a great many musical compositions and had a large number of children. In between he practiced on an old spinster which he kept up in his attic. Rock Monanoff was a famous post-romantic composer of piano concerti. Share this article with a friend.
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I
don’t get to Ripley, MS, as often as I once did. My barber there, Malcolm
Lindsey, retired a couple of years ago, and I began driving to Memphis to
get my hair cut. Yet, for more than thirty years, I drove from Pontotoc to
Ripley about every four weeks. Malcolm has since reopened his barbershop,
"The Razor’s Edge," but he discontinued the practice of having his clientele
make appointments, and now cuts hair on a first-come, first-served basis,
which doesn’t work for me as well as the appointment system.
