March 26 '05
Volume 460


Community Theatre Smoke On The Mountain
Virginia Dillard may have been the first person to mention to me the Pontotoc Community Theatre’s plans to present Smoke On The Mountain.

"I hear it’s really good, and I’ll bet you’d enjoy it," she told me recently on one of my trips to drop off RRN’s Bodock Beau, which she and others send to deployed members of The 155th Regiment of the Army National Guard.

Additionally, Miss Virginia told me her daughter-in-law, Ina Dillard, was helping with the production but was not a member of the cast.

"There’s also a group that will be singing hymns, too," she continued. "I don’t know how that’s going to turn out with just one rehearsal, but everyone has a copy of the music. Maybe, they’ll do okay. Gerald Waldrop, ‘you know him, don’t you?’ is going to lead the singers, and Ellouise [Dallas] is playing the piano."

Days before the production, both the Pontotoc Progress and the Daily Journal had articles and pictures of the cast, but I don’t think I read anything about the play other than the names of the cast and the price of admission. At eight dollars per person, it sounded too good to be true. Why, I’ve paid ten dollars to be miserable at beauty pageants in the same auditorium. Plus, any entertainment held at the Bancorp South Center in Tupelo will cost a minimum of thirty dollars per ticket and fifty-seven dollars isn’t too high for some concerts. The last time I checked, I couldn’t name any celebrity I’d fork over fifty-seven dollars plus the obligatory $3.95 handling fee to see.

Smoke On The Mountain was scheduled for two performances, one on Saturday night and one as a Sunday matinee. I figured Saturday would work best for me, but after washing my car Saturday afternoon and lazing around the house the rest of the day, I really didn’t want to interrupt my lazy schedule with getting cleaned up to go somewhere. However, Barbara must not have been as exhausted as she claimed, having spent the past two weeks working mostly non-stop with Habitat volunteers from all over the country.

"I’d like to go see the Community Theatre, tonight," she shared.

"I think I'd rather go tomorrow afternoon," I replied, rescinding my earlier thoughts. "Aren’t you too worn out to go tonight?"

Barbara had left home around eight o’clock Saturday morning to attend a Habitat workshop in Oxford, MS and didn’t get back home until around four o’clock.

"Well, I don’t know if we’ll have time tomorrow afternoon or not," she said.

Our Sunday afternoons get a little hectic some weekends, but hectic or not we try to visit Lillie Belle at Pontotoc Hospital Nursing Home and Aunt Jo at Sunshine Nursing Home. Throw in a Community Theatre production with the nursing home visitations and follow up with an Easter choir performance by First Baptist Church that evening and a Sunday afternoon nap is out of the question.

"I’m not going to church tomorrow morning," I stated, without elaboration, but I had made that decision a couple of weeks earlier for reasons I don’t care to share at this time. "I’d rather go to the Community Theatre tomorrow afternoon than tonight."

"Okay," she said, without signifying approval so much as acceptance.

Personally, I figured the night of relaxation at home would do Barbara Anne more good than a dose of culture. And, the next morning she looked less drained, but as she was about to leave to fulfill her obligation to assist with a group of four-year olds in Sunday School, she told me she wasn’t staying for church and would see me after Sunday School.

The Sunday matinee was at 2:00 p.m. We arrived about fifteen minutes early.

"Where do you want to sit?" Barbara asked.

"Anywhere you can see," I replied, indicating I had no particular preference as long as she was able to see the folks on stage.

Seating in the old high school auditorium (now the junior high auditorium) sits on a back-to-front slope, but it’s not spacious enough to allow a person of small stature to see over or around a large person.

A group of singers, clad in overalls and long dresses reminiscent of the 1930s, stood in front of the stage area singing hymns as we found a seat alongside Rev. Kenneth Corley and his wife, Glenda. It was only then that I connected the "hymn singing" and the Theatre production as occurring on the same day. I’m sure Miss Virginia had told me they were related, but I had managed to disjoin the two in my mind.

The singers numbered around twenty. They sang old hymns, supposedly hymns popular in the 1930s. Members of the audience were encouraged to sing along, too. I tried to sing a little bass, but without a songbook, I have a hard time nailing my part. So, I didn’t sing too loudly and maybe it wasn’t too badly off key. At least, nobody in front of me turned around and frowned.

Smoke On The Mountain is a two act play that is a musical comedy. According to one website, "It’s 1938 and you are invited to the Mount Pleasant Church ‘first ever Saturday Night Sing’. The Reverend Oglethorpe welcomes the Sanders Family Singers to provide an uplifting evening of singin’ and witnessin’. This delightfully entertaining evening brings some of the best old gospel tunes ever written including: ‘Amazing Grace’, ‘Church in the Wildwood’, ‘Wonderful Time Up There’ and ‘I'll Fly Away’.  So, pull up a pew and join them as they unite for a foot-stomping festival of joy! A magnificent blend of story and song that will have you clapping, singing, laughing and cheering!"

I must admit that I truly enjoyed the play and was pleasantly surprised by the number of musical numbers. Because no electronic sound amplification was employed, the music came across as true to the era. Unfortunately, the high school auditorium of my youth has no better acoustics today than it did when I was a student, and it was difficult to clearly understand all the performers. Sometimes the voices of the singers were lost among the instruments, piano, acoustic guitar, banjo, mandolin, and tambourines. But, the familiarity of the hymns helped me enjoy the music anyway.

As a comedy, the play lived up to it’s billing, but some of the funniest portions were unspoken. The three ladies occupying a pew, identified by the preacher as the amen corner, never said a word audible for the audience. They confined their remarks to themselves, but their expressions spoke volumes as to what they thought of some of the goings on, and they all but wore out their hand fans. The three ladies were good, but the show-stealer was a waif of a lass, who told us early that she wasn’t a singer but was a "signer."

"I told Mama there weren’t any deaf folks in church, but she said it didn’t matter, I needed the practice."

While a number of her signs were legitimate, some, for the sake of entertainment, were obviously fake, such as the one in which she arched her arms and clenched fists over her head to flex her muscles and indicate the word, "power" in the song, There Is Power In The Blood.

Smoke On The Mountain is a popular play and has been performed by a number of community theaters around the country. If it comes to a Theatre near you, I recommend it highly.


Hawaiian Stores ABC Stores & Zippy's

At the end of 2004 and the beginning of 2005, my wife [Sheila] and I had the pleasure of visiting Hawaii. It is a beautiful place, and we enjoyed many, many memorable attractions and activities while visiting four of the islands. They are unique, and I want to tell you about them.

Growing up in Alabama, I learned that if someone was going to the ABC Store, they were going to purchase alcohol. That is not the case in Hawaii. Although they do have alcoholic beverages, the ABC Stores in Hawaii sell film, aspirin, suntan lotion, souvenirs, towels, postcards, flip-flops and much, much more.

It is very easy to locate ABC Stores, since there are hundreds of them. On Waikiki Beach, which is a shopper’s paradise, there may be as many as two on the same block. It is possible to stand at the entrance of one ABC Store and see another one down the street. Hawaii is not very big, but there are ABC Stores everywhere. They are for tourists, and tourism is the biggest industry on the islands. There are so many ABC Stores that all of the tour directors eventually tell a joke or story about them. While we were in Hawaii, I can assure you that everybody in our group went to an ABC Store, and probably more than one time.

Zippy’s is a local restaurant chain on the islands, and is comparable to Shoney’s without a buffet line. The name supposedly came about because the first Zippy’s was located on a line dividing two zip codes. That sounded reasonable to me, but for all I knew it could have been because of their quick service. Zippy’s prices are moderate (for Hawaii), the food is good, and the menu has many choices for the customer.

The one thing that sets Zippy’s apart from all the restaurants I have ever been to is that they serve --- SPAM! We were told this is because of the armed forces, and that it is a holdover from W.W.II. Apparently, the islanders like it very much, also. I personally like SPAM, so I ordered a Zip Pack. This sounds like a takeout meal, but it is not.

The Zip Pack includes fried chicken, fried fish, and fried SPAM, along with two vegetables, a roll, and pineapple slices. You can even get pineapple at McDonald’s in Hawaii. I enjoyed eating at Zippy’s and can recommend it to you. If you don’t like SPAM, there are many other options, including seafood.

If I ever have the opportunity to go back to Hawaii, I will certainly go to a Zippy’s and an ABC Store. I hope those who read this will be able to go to Hawaii, and if you do, be sure to give Zippy’s a try. I am 100 percent sure you will go to an ABC Store, since they have all of the items tourists leave home without, plus great souvenirs.

By Jim Hess, Vicksburg, MS.


Made In Germany Miniature Pocketknife

I drove in from Indianola Thursday evening (03/23) hoping Barbara had something going for supper, but supper was still on her to-do list.

I had hardly set down my computer bag when she said, "You’re supposed to call Floyd McCullough."

"Do you know what he wants?" I asked, hoping to pry more information out of my wife.

"He came by the office today and said the other half of your Christmas present came in."

"The other half…" I thought, trying to remember what the first half had been.

And, I did remember that just before Christmas, Barbara and I dropped by to visit the McCulloughs and to leave them a small gift symbolizing our appreciation of their friendship. Miss Ruth apologized that the rest of our gift had not arrived, though earlier Mr. Floyd had brought us a couple of freezer bags filled with ready-to-bake sausage balls.

I phoned the McCullough residence to let them know I was back in town. Miss Ruth answered the phone and explained that she and Mr. Floyd would like to drop by in the next few minutes.

Barbara keeps a pretty neat kitchen, and that’s a good thing, because most of our friends enter our home via the kitchen door, which exits to the garage.

I helped Barbara tidy up a bit as we awaited the McCulloughs. Minutes later the McCulloughs arrived and Mr. Floyd pulled two packages out of his pockets.

"Now, I wouldn’t make you do this," Miss Ruth assured.

"I’m going to let you pick which one you want," Mr. Floyd explained. "You can’t have both."

I had no idea what was in either package, as I encouraged them to have a seat at the kitchen table and Barbara poured the coffee. By the time I sat down, I was as excited as a child opening a Christmas present.

Mr. Floyd handed me a small envelope that he took from a metal container that he explained as "not the box it came in." It felt metallic through it’s packaging, and I wondered if it were a commemorative coin or medal. As it slid out of the envelope, I clearly saw that it was a miniature pocketknife.

I quickly opened and extended one of its two blades, while admiring the finish of the polished wood handles. The second package also contained a miniature pocketknife. It had one blade and felt slightly lighter than the first one.

"This is a hard decision," I shared.

"I told Floyd he ought to just pick one and give it to you," Miss Ruth chided.

As I compared the two knives, I remembered Mr. Floyd showing me a tiny knife someone had crafted for him shortly after I wrote an article last year on pocketknives, and the way I took on over it, it’s no wonder he and Miss Ruth thought something similar would make a perfect Christmas gift for me. Since their son, David, lives in Germany, they had asked him to pick out a suitable knife after he returned from vacationing here at Christmas.

"I like both of them, but I’m going to choose this one," I said, picking up the single bladed of the two. "I have a folding hunting knife and this one reminds me of it."

Before the McCulloughs left, I weighed the two knives on my digital, postal scale. The double bladed one weighed 0.4 oz., and the single bladed one weighed 0.3 oz. To help readers relate the sizes of the miniature knives, my hunting knife (on the right) weighs 7.5 ozs, which makes it 25 times heaver than the miniature one I kept.


Bodock Beau King Of Late Night

You may like the humor of Dave Letterman, but I maintain that Jay Leno has the best writers. Here are a few excerpts from Jay's recent monologues.

Jay Leno.... Well folks, on the second anniversary of the invasion of Iraq, gas prices in California have hit three dollars a gallon in some places. Three dollars a gallon! Didn't we win that war? I mean, I know there's no weapons of mass destruction, but apparently there's no gas there either. .... Gas prices are so high, Robert Blake and O.J. are forced to carpool in their search for the real killers. .... Congress is investigating steroid use in baseball. Apparently we've cured cancer and all the other problems of the world so now we're starting on this one. .... Congress investigating steroids. It's kind of ironic, isn't it? Ted Kennedy asking somebody how their head got so big. .... President Clinton is recovering quite well. In fact, he just passed a stress test or, as he called it, a weekend with Hillary.

Here's something fascinating -- a space probe that landed on Saturn's moon Titan has found that it is filled with rivers and clouds of liquid methane. Either that or the probe may have landed in a river in New Jersey. .... There are two companies now advertising they make RVs that can withstand radiation from a nuclear attack. Was there a big call for this?! People upset: "You know, last time we were under nuclear attack our vacation was completely ruined because our RV couldn't take the 10,000-degree temperature!" .... Do you know what week this is in our public schools? I'm not making this up: This week is National No Name-Calling Week. They don't want any name-calling in our public schools. What stupid dork came up with this idea?.... Researchers at USC report that foreign immigration to California will slow down over the next 25 years. Of course it will slow down. You think that's because maybe everybody is already here? .... A federal appeals court reinstated a lawsuit filed by two teenagers against McDonald's for making them fat. McDonald's made the kids fat! The court said McDonald's may have violated New York's consumer protection act by not telling people what's in their food. We're talking about McNuggets here! Even McDonald's doesn't know what's in those things!

From The Federalist Patriot (http://www.FederalistPatriot.US)

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