January 22 '05 |
|
Volume 451 |
Albania
Albania You Border On The Adriatic
For three days of this past week, I attended the winter meeting
of the combined Retail Technology Departments for the Southeast and Midwest
regions of SUPERVALU. While the purpose of the meeting was to discuss business
opportunities, become better informed of developments in new cash register
systems and electronic payments, review achievements for the present fiscal
year, and establish goals for the new fiscal year that begins in March, it
was also an opportunity to renew acquaintances and enjoy the fellowship of
old friends.
A certain amount of stress is always present during our business meetings,
but we had plenty of time to relax each evening in a dinner situation. But,
wouldnt you know, the three major international foods that I least
enjoy, Chinese, Mexican, and Italian were served in three of the five meals
we ate as a group. I realize my tastes arent typical, so I tried not
to complain about the restaurant choices made for me and ate only those foods
I selected in extreme moderation.
Seated at a long table in a busy restaurant with a party of sixteen to twenty
individuals makes for difficult conversation except for those in ones immediate
vicinity. Most members of our group are beer drinkers, and Ive noted
that as bellies grow fuller, tongues grow looser, and laughter grows louder.
But, its in such an environment that old times are remembered, and
oft-told tales are retold. Among the more interesting tales shared, all true
of course, was a somewhat recent happening recalled by Carl Kaercher, one
of our guests from SUPERVALU headquarters in Minneapolis.
Carls son, Mark, an architectural major, attended career day during
his senior year and was impressed with what guest Bob Villa had to say. It
seems Bob Villa (one-time host of the TV program, This Old House) was once
in the Peace Corps, and Villa spent much of his allotted time sharing how
his experience with the Peace Corps completely changed his life. Mark was
inspired to join the Peace Corps upon graduation and is now working in his
second year of volunteer service in Albania, a small country bordering the
Adriatic Sea.
Carl shared that soon after his son began his first year of service, he noted
the teens played soccer using a makeshift soccer ball formed of bundled rags
bound together with tape.
"Dad, could you send over a few soccer balls?" the son asked during one of
his calls home after explaining the need.
Carl complied with his sons request and boxed up a half-dozen deflated
soccer balls, to enable them to fit into a smaller container, and packed
an air pump with a couple of extra needles. When his son received the shipment
he excitedly took the package to the playground area, and several teens gathered
around to watch him open the box from America.
"I started pumping air into the new soccer balls, and after a few minutes
I noticed all the teens had disappeared," his son later told him. "But, later
they came back, and they all had a deflated soccer ball."
The players had plenty of soccer balls, but, living in a country of want,
they lacked the device to keep them inflated, namely an air pump. As I reflected
on the story, I found more than just a touch of irony in the incident. There
seemed to be a lesson for all of us bent on helping others. Sometimes, to
be aware of a need and to be willing to help is not enough. It may prove
beneficial to know what factors contributed to the need.
Two nights later, I was seated directly across the table from Carl Kaercher.
To refresh my memory, I asked him how his son became interested in the Peace
Corps. Thats when he shared the information regarding Bob Villa. It
was also the night that Bob McGehee and Carl shared a bit of trivia from
the Cheers TV program.
One of them commented that the location of Albania came up during a Cheers
episode and asked, "Remember the song about Albania?"
I didnt know what they were talking about, but right away Carl broke
into song and was quickly joined by Bob, "Albania! Albania! You border on
the Adriatic
"
Apparently, I missed that Cheers episode, but for some fans, it held
a memorable lesson in geography.
Wayne Hunter, like me, is a Retail Technology specialist in our department,
and, as such, is assigned to a large group of SUPERVALU accounts. Wayne lives
in Cape Girardeau, MO and services retail stores in Missouri, Illinois, and
Iowa. Since we were asked to drive to Champaign, I contacted Wayne and asked
about our riding together from Cape Girardeau. I wasnt too keen on
driving north of the Mason Dixon line in the middle of January and was thrilled
when Wayne agreed to drive us to Champaign.
Wayne grew up in northern Arkansas and is one of those guys who makes friends
easily, is liked by just about everyone, and when it comes to parties, laughs
the loudest and tells the most tales.
SUPERVALU acquired the services of Wayne Hunter when SUPERVALU bought the
Wetterau Corporation in the 1990s. Wayne held several positions for Wetterau
prior to settling down in Retail Technology. In fact, he hired my boss, Bob
McGehee. Hes proud of that, but Id say hes prouder of having
hired a tall blonde named Diana Gorton. Diana was a part of our group until
recently when she accepted a position in Retail Pricing, and our recent winter
meeting was poorer for it, due to the absence of her good looks and great
smile.
As Wayne tells it, he hired a number of folks when he headed up Retail Operations
for the Wetterau office in Bloomington, IN. He explained that whenever an
applicant came into his office for an interview, the applicant had to make
his or her way through a maze of desks, occupied largely by males, to get
to his door. And, it wasnt uncommon for male onlookers to rate female
applicants using scoring cards like judges at an Olympic event.
"After the interview was over and the applicant had left my office, Id
look out and see cards in the air, 6.5, 7.0, 6.0 etc," Wayne shared. "But
on the day I interviewed Diana, there were lots of 9.5s and 10s."
Needless to say, Wayne rated her a ten.
Of the several tales Wayne Hunter retold during our trip to Champaign, my
favorite follows:
"Do yall remember the time we all met in Minneapolis after SUPERVALU
bought us [Wetterau]?" Wayne quizzed.
Personally, I remember the day quite well and recall that I shared with everyone
at our introductory meeting how I had been insulted by a cab driver who made
fun of my pronunciation of the name of the motel I asked about. And now,
Ive forgotten how the locals pronounce "Sofitel," but I didnt
interrupt Waynes story.
"Everybody had arrived there that evening except the new guy from the Eastern
Division. Somebody said the new guy needed a ride from the airport. I must
have been the only one with a rental car, so I volunteered to go pick him
up. His name was Dan
cant remember his last name." Wayne continued.
"Well, I get to the airport, go to the baggage claim area associated with
his airline, and theres only one guy in the whole place. Hes
wearing blue jeans and holding a suitcase. We all wore suits back then, but
I figured he had on his traveling clothes."
"I holler, Dan! and he yells back, Yeah!"
"Come on! I yelled, waving him over, Weve got plenty
of beer and women! Then we got into the car and started to the motel."
Wayne was joking about the women but dead serious about the beer.
"We were almost to the motel when Dan said, You got beer? Man, this
is gonna be great, I just got out of the pen."
"You are Dan arent you?" Wayne asked, incredulously.
"Yeah."
"Dan with Wetterau?"
"No, but Im Dan. Im here to attend a drug-rehabilitation program.
I just got out of prison."
"I started looking for a way to cross the median, in a hurry," Wayne laughed.
"I braked hard, slid across the median, squealed tires, drove back to the
airport as fast as I could, and got him out of my car.
Our Dan still wasnt there, so I drove back to the motel. His plane
arrived later than expected, and he had already phoned the motel to let them
know he was taking a cab, so everyone was asking me what happened when I
got back. I had to tell them. There was no keeping it from them."
To me, its funnier to hear Wayne tell the story and get to watch his
facial expressions and animations. Watching him, one can almost see him going
through his airport ordeal.
I dont look forward to traveling to another meeting in Champaign, but
Ill happily do so as long as I can carpool with Wayne Hunter and later
enjoy the fellowship of other friends, even if everyone but me likes Chinese,
Mexican, and Italian foods. Plus, I might learn some more Cheers trivia.
Saturday Lunch
Seasons At The White Church
It seems we cant get done with Christmas. There are too many relatives
with too many families for everyone to get together at the same time or even
during the same week.
Sarahs son and his wife live in Pearl, MS. But, Brett and Kathy
couldnt be in Pontotoc for Christmas, because they spent Christmas
in El Paso, and while they were there became snow bound during a trip to
see Carlsbad Caverns. Additionally, Brett and Kathy closed on the purchase
of a house on December 29 and were to move into it shortly thereafter.
Barbaras grandniece (the one Im in the habit of calling our "new
niece," because she previously laid claim to being kinfolk by discovering
on my website that her biological mother, Carol OKelley, was
Barbaras niece), Rhea Palmer, wanted to spend some time with us, her
newly found family, but found its easier said than done. However, her
aunts, Cheryl and Barbara, decided a meeting could happen on the Saturday
after New Years Day.
Since Rhea and her family live in Oakland, TN, Cheryl suggested we could
all meet in Collierville, TN, which is a somewhat central location for Oakland,
Southaven, Pontotoc, and Belmont.
"I know this neat restaurant in Collierville," Cheryl explained. "Its
in an old church and has a unique atmosphere. Ive eaten there, and
I like the food, plus, I can make our reservations."
First of all, let me say that I love Cheryl dearly, but whenever I hear women
discussing a place to eat and the word, "neat," is a key word describing
the restaurant, I can safely bet its a place where Ill have trouble
finding something to order. Cheryl emailed Barbara a copy of the
restaurants menu, and sure enough, most selections didnt appeal
to my "meat and potatoes" mindset. But, its like eating in a Chinese
restaurant, in that if I dont have to do it more than once a year,
I can cope.
Barbara and I had no trouble locating the Collierville restaurant,
Seasons At The White Church, and, shortly before noon, the two
of us were the first of our group to arrive, followed by Cheryl, then Rhea
and Little Tommy, and finally Rayannes family. (Barbaras mounting
a campaign to nickname Little Tommy, T.J., because its not likely
hell stay little much longer.)
We were shown to a private dining room that offered us plenty of privacy,
which came in handy once the childrens period of good behavior wore
thin. I think everyone enjoyed the food, except the children, but then perhaps
its unreasonable to expect a "high end" restaurant to offer much variety
for a childs plate.
After lunch, presents
were opened, and we later toured the dining area in the former sanctuary,
where no one was eating, and, for all I know, is a room reserved for special
occasions. The owner of the restaurant made a picture of our group in the
sanctuary, and is shown here.
It was after two oclock when we left the restaurant. Barbara and I
headed toward Pontotoc, but Rayannes folks and Cheryl wanted to shop
at the nearby Kohls before leaving.
All in all, we had a good time, and while the food didnt appeal to
me, I doubt we could have found a better place to meet for a Saturday lunch.
Back To
School Jason Enrolls At ICC
Barbara and I are thrilled to report that Jason enrolled for the spring semester
at Itawamba Community College in Fulton. Jason spent two years there after
graduating high school. This time, with him being responsible for tuition
and books, we are expecting him to take his education more seriously, plus,
hes been in the workforce long enough to realize the value of a college
education.
He hopes to get a degree in Computer Science at a University. Unfortunately,
Mississippi State has the edge on Ole Miss in computer science, so he may
be the first of my family to break the Ole Miss tradition. Ive promised
Barbara I wont disinherit him until after he graduates. (Dont
take me too seriously.)
Bodock Beau
Being Southern
We who are privileged to live in the South are often the object of ridicule
by persons ignorant of our good fortune. Thus it is with no small amount
of pride that we share the following observations on being Southern:
-
Only a Southerner knows the difference between a hissie fit and a conniption
fit, and that you don't "HAVE" them, you "PITCH" them.
-
Only a Southerner knows how many fish, collard greens, turnip greens, peas,
beans, etc., make up "a mess."
-
Only a Southerner can show or point out to you the general direction of "yonder."
-
All Southerners know exactly when "by and by" is. They might not use the
term, but they know the concept well.
-
Only a Southerner knows instinctively that the best gesture of solace for
a neighbor who's got trouble is a plate of hot fried chicken and a big bowl
of cold potato salad. If the neighbor's trouble is a real crisis, they also
know to add a large banana puddin!
-
Only Southerners grow up knowing the difference between "right near" and
"a right far piece." They also know that "just down the road" can be 1 mile
or 20.
-
Only a Southerner, both knows and understands, the difference between a redneck,
a good ol' boy, and po' white trash.
-
No true Southerner would ever assume that the car with the flashing turn
signal is actually going to make a turn.
-
A Southerner knows that "fixin" can be used as a noun, a verb, or an adverb.
-
Only Southerners make friends while standing in lines. We don't do "queues,"
we do "lines"; and when we're "in line," we talk to everybody!
-
Put 100 Southerners in a room and half of them will discover they're related,
even if only by marriage.
-
Southerners never refer to one person as "yall."
-
Southerners know grits come from corn and how to eat them.
-
Every Southerner knows tomatoes with eggs, bacon, grits, and coffee are perfectly
wonderful; that red eye gravy is also a breakfast food; and that fried green
tomatoes are not a breakfast food.
-
When you hear someone say, "Well, I caught myself lookin'," you know you
are in the presence of a genuine Southerner!
-
Only true Southerners say "sweet tea" and "sweet milk." Sweet tea indicates
the need for sugar and lots of it -- we do not like our tea unsweetened.
"Sweet milk" means you don't want buttermilk.
Submitted by Ken Gaillard
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