RRN Online Volume 392

December 06 '03

Volume 392

Thanksgiving 2003 It Happened At Sarah's

I don't Holiday Dreamt Of think it fair to blame my romanticism entirely on Perry Como, but surely he must shoulder some of it. After all, it's Mr. Como that I remember singing "Home For The Holidays," and during most holiday seasons I find myself humming the tune or singing the lyrics to myself. Fortunately, the "Como Era" occurred long before music videos became popular, so I drew upon my imagination to visualize the scenes he described in song rather than being spoon-fed some choreographed song and dance number with a producer/ director's presumption of suitable backdrops.

Oh, there's no place like home for the holidays,
'cause no matter how far away you roam,
When you pine for the sunshine of a friendly gaze,
For the holidays, you can't beat home, sweet home.

I met a man who lives in Tennessee, and he was headin' for,
Pennsylvania and some homemade pumpkin pie!
From Pennsylvania folks are trav'lin'
Down to Dixie's sunny shore,
From Atlantic to Pacific,
Gee, the traffic is terrific!

I've changed a few words over the years, subbing "if" for when, "face" for gaze, and "lived" for lives, and the tune I carry may be off a note or two here and there. Though, I've seldom traveled even forty miles to be home for the holidays, I can identify with the man from Tennessee and the folks from Pennsylvania and all those from Atlantic to Pacific. We share a common malady--traffic, and a common destination--home. When it comes to holidays, most of us abide with the adage "The difference is worth the distance," which is to say that regardless how far we have to travel to be home for the holidays, the time with family makes all the difference in the world.

We romantics, though, are a dying breed. Being with one's family is becoming less important with the passing of each holiday season. Admittedly, the definition of "being with one's family" has changed, but there was a time when brothers and sisters, aunts and uncles, and other relatives tried to make it to Grandma's house for Thanksgiving and Christmas. It was like a mini reunion.

These days, it's bad enough that professional sports lure thousands away from family events each Thanksgiving, but even the collegiate world schedules sports events such as the Egg Bowl, the annual football game between Ole Miss and Mississippi State played on Thanksgiving Day. Worse still, are the high school and citywide soccer tournaments that vie for family time on Thanksgiving Day.

The family of one RRN reader went to Disney World for the week of Thanksgiving. So, now I should add theme parks and vacations to my list of occasions that compete for family time during Holidays, especially since Rayanne, immediately after Thanksgiving dinner, drug her family and my wife to Destin, FL, on a shopping excursion and didn't make it to Dad's at all.

Within my family, I've lived long enough to see Thanksgiving holiday celebrations change from being observed at Grandma's house to Mama's house to my house, and, in recent years, to my sister's house. My brothers are not able to join us, but Sarah's family and my family have been getting together on Thanksgiving Day at Sarah's house since 1996. She sets the table for Thanksgiving, and we set it at our house on Christmas Day.

This Thanksgiving, Sarah fed eleven of us, including those Aunt Jo would describe as Barbara's people. Barbara's mom, her sister's two daughters and one granddaughter were on hand as were Sarah's son and his wife, plus Barbara, Jason, and me. Aunt Jo was still hospitalized, but we took her a plate anyway. It was Rayanne's in-laws' turn to have Rayanne's family for Thanksgiving, which was a better excuse than Felicia could muster for not being home for the big meal.

Whether it was of her magnanimity or her "idiotity" (yes, I made up that word) is uncertain. All I know for certain is that Felicia was scheduled to be off for the holiday, but when a coworker, who was scheduled to work Thanksgiving Day, made her wishes known to Felicia, Felicia volunteered to work in her coworker's place. She could have spent Thanksgiving with her family, but she chose otherwise. Foolishly, I figured Felicia would be home for leftovers that evening, but she had other plans…something about a boyfriend. Oh well, you have to let them make their own decisions at some point in time.

Speaking of decisions, I just made one. For Christmas, I should get Felicia a copy of Perry Como's album, "Home For The Holidays."

Christmas Update Lynette Breaks With Tradition

Last year, Lynette Carlson shared with the readership of RRN, as well as her large family, her intent to change how she observed and celebrated Christmas. Lynette is unmarried and without children, but has several brothers and sisters who invite her to celebrate Christmas with them each year. Feeling, as many of us do or have, that Christmas has become all too commercialized and frantic to enjoy, Lynette announced to her siblings she would be taking steps to put "Christ" back into Christmas and was surprised by their supportiveness.

In the weeks that followed (publishing her story), I sort of lost track of time as I returned to work after being off several days during Christmas and New Years. It was early March before it occurred to me that I had not followed up to find out how Lynette's Christmas turned out. I emailed her and asked her to let me know what happened, and within a week she responded. With permission to use, her response follows:

Wayne; Sorry it's taken me so long to reply. I too have been very busy here at work, and I don't own a computer at home to do this type of stuff.

Well, the short answer to your question is, YES, my plan worked beautifully. I was able to enjoy the full extent of Christmas without the hassle or commercialism attached.

I got to church Christmas Eve as I had intended. I needed to be there anyhow because I am an Ambassador at church, and we greet people. Well, that was really nice because I got to participate in handling out glass cups with a lit candle in them for our Silent Night song. At the end of the service the sanctuary is darkened and we sing Silent Night while holding these lit candles. It's quite beautiful.

Then from there I went to my niece Monica's house for the Christmas celebration. It was a small gathering with just her parents (my sister being her mother) her son, her son's father and his mother. We had a nice buffet of food and then played a dice game. (Now just wait a minute we were not gambling with them) But we all brought one or two very inexpensive wrapped gifts and put them on the floor. Then when you rolled the dice and got a double, you would get a gift from the pile on the floor. You do not open the gift until all have been won. Then you open them and continue to roll the dice for a double then when that happens you get to take a gift from someone else. This has a time limit on it so it doesn't go on and on and on. Though it sounds dumb, it is quite fun. Some of the gifts are funny but some are quite practical.

After that we passed out the gifts that we brought each other. That was real nice because we all very much liked and appreciated the gifts. I also took pictures and video taped some of the evening fun.

On Christmas Day, I visited an older cousin of mine. Her son and daughter are about the same age as me. I don't get to see them often except the usual wedding and funerals. It happened that this past summer her son Mike lost his wife of 25 years in a car accident. She was on life-support for a few weeks but eventually her husband had to make the decision to remove her when her condition never got better. This Christmas for the first time in many years Mike came home to be with his family. I wanted to see him since I did not attend the funeral for his wife. It was very private and only a few people were there. I had a very nice dinner with my cousins, and we got to talk about things that happened years ago. It was a lovely afternoon. I know that it helped my cousin Mike to get his mind off of his loneliness for a while. He lives in the woods in northern Minnesota. He and his wife never had children and only raised hunting dogs. Mike invited me to visit this summer. I told him I would, but it would have to be after wood tick season, because I am really a City Girl! He just laughed.

One of the other things I wanted to change was that I was not going to exchange gifts with anyone in the family (my siblings). I usually buy gifts for everyone for every Christmas celebration I would go to. Besides the cost, it was exhausting. When I suggested to my siblings that we should not exchange gifts this year, they agreed. Well, wouldn't you know that when I began to visit my siblings in the days after Christmas to see how it went for them, there was always a few gifts for me. The excuse they gave was that they had already wanted to give me this before I made the suggestion. I felt a bit uncomfortable because I was the only one that stuck to my idea. But, it was nice to get the gifts. I think they thought that I probably would not have had received any gifts if they kept their word on not exchanging gifts.

In summary, I think I will continue to celebrate Christmas this way. I will want to attend at least one of my family's get-togethers but not more than that. Besides, I think I got more present this way.

Bodock Beau Not Peculiar To Georgia Alone

Most of the following observations are true of Mississippi and other Deep South states, too. However these were submitted by a Georgia resident.

Things I know about Georgia:

Possums sleep in the middle of the road with their feet in the air.
There are 5,000 types of snakes and 4,998 live in Georgia.
There are 10,000 types of spiders. All 10,000 live in Georgia, plus a couple no one's seen before.
Squirrels will eat anything.
Unknown critters love to dig holes under tomato plants.
Raccoons will test your crop of melons and let you know when they are ripe.
If it grows, it sticks; if it crawls, it bites.
A tractor is NOT an all terrain vehicle. They do get stuck.
Onced and Twiced are words.
It is not a shopping cart, it is a buggy.
Fire ants consider your flesh as a picnic.
People actually grow and eat okra.
Fixinto is one word.
There ain't no such thing as "lunch". There's only dinner and then there's supper.
Tea is appropriate for all meals and you start drinking it when you're 2 - sweet tea, that is!!!
Backards and forwards means I know everything about you.
Jeet? is actually a phrase meaning "Did you eat?"
You work until you're done or it's too dark to see.
You measure distance in minutes.
Stores don't have bags; they have sacks.
You see a car running in the parking lot at the store with no one in it, no matter what time of the year.
All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit, vegetable, grain, insect or animal.
You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both unlocked.
You carry jumper cables in your car ... for your OWN car.
You know what "cow tipping" is.
You only own four spices: salt, pepper, chili powder, and catsup.
The local papers cover national and international news on one page, but requires 6 pages for local gossip and sports.
You think that the first day of deer season is a national holiday.
You describe the first cool snap (below 70 degrees) as good chili weather.
A carbonated soft drink isn't a soda, cola, or pop... it's a Coke, regardless of brand or flavor. Example "What kinna' coke you want?"
Fried Catfish is the other white meat.

Submitted by Dr. Mac Molnar

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